Really very sad for this moment

Finally, i've finished re-booting my computer, everything started to work out well. I went to Min's blog to take a look and heard the sound she uploaded in her blog. For a moment, i cried very hard. This is the first time i cried after i have broke up with her. Really.

Suddenly everything seems to happen just yesterday, all the things that happened when i was with her were still so fresh, so fresh in my memory. I can't forget how we celebrated our anniversaries cum birthdays, our valentine day (last year and this year), more... I really cannot take her out of my mind.

I know this is a little crazy of me, fancy bring troubles out when there should be none now. But, what can i really do? I really cannot forget her, her looks, her way of caring me, more...

I blamed myself, for letting her go just like that.
I blamed myself, for not making her stay last year June 5.
I blamed myself, for not loving more than i could give.
I blamed myself, for giving up such a nice girl.
I blamed myself, for not being a good lover.
I blamed myself, for not treasuring her.
I blamed myself, for all the happenings that has happened between the both of us.

Well, esp this time round, i was down very high fever and sore throat. I finally feel what is loneliness and sadness. I am sad when i cannot see her anmore and get her TLC anymore. I'm lonely becaue i have to face the illness all by myself.

I'm stupid, for letting her go.
I'm stupid, for not making her stay.
I'm stupid, for not saying anything on 10Apr .
I'm stupid..


I really don't know how to survive through the days without her.
I think i would have no mood o carry on anything meaningful anymore..

I'm as if a bird which once could fly high, realised that one of my wings is gone.
I'm as if a fish, which once can swim freely in ocean, but trapped in a fishtank.
I'm as if a drug addicter, without the drugs to suppress my illness.
I'm as if a person who get tied down to the ground who can only give the world my saddest sound, my saddest sound.

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They said that time will make the pain fade away, but why didn't it happen on me? Ir eally need to forget her, if not i am unable to carry on with my next phrase of life.

What can i really do??


I guess tears and sorrow would be my best friends tonight, sleeping with me.


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The last school bell

>> A story of romance, coming in ten chapters, is coming to your way. Look forward to it>>>